Motherhood and ministry

Almost 3 months since Elias was born! I was told before we had him that the days were long and the years are short and I can really see that.

I’m so grateful to get to be going back to ministry and get to take care of Elias. The last couple months have been really eye opening to me and I’ve realized how much I really do enjoy others and the work that God has given me. But it’s also a joy to be Elias’s mom. I’m glad I can do both! I’m going to go back to ministry part time. We’re figuring out childcare but I’m also thankful I get to do the kind of work where I can bring him with me!

Not working has really taught me that God works even when I’m not working. That it’s not up to me to change peoples hearts or minds. There’s nothing special about me but it’s God working through me that changes people. It’s freeing to be reminded of this. It’s not my job to save people but point them to the one who can. 

At the beginning of this month, we went on a staff retreat and it was so encouraging to be back together with our staff. They are such an encouraging and sweet group of people. Our talks were centered on a book and that idea of everything coming out of love and love being our goal. Often other goals get in the way. I’ve noticed it in motherhood. I have the goal to be perceived as certain way rather than to love those I’m with. I can have the goal to read more scripture but it doesn’t lead me to love if it doesn’t come from love. It’s easy to get distracted from the heart of things.

My prayer this year is that I can really love those that I’m with. The girls in my peer team, those in our ministry that I meet with, our campus staff, Drew and Elias! I know I’m limited in my capacity for production in this season but it doesn’t limit my capacity for love!